How do I handle it when a friend vents to me constantly about their life but never does anything to change it?

When a friend constantly vents but doesn’t take steps toward change, it can leave you feeling frustrated, drained, or stuck in a one-sided dynamic.

One of the most helpful things you can do is set gentle, respectful boundaries. You might say something like, “I care about you and want to support you but I’ve noticed we keep having the same conversation, and I’m wondering if you’d be open to talking about what kind of support you’re actually looking for.” This shifts the focus from passive venting to active problem-solving, if they’re ready for it. If not, it’s okay to limit how much time or energy you give to those conversations. Supporting someone doesn’t mean absorbing their pain or fixing their life. It’s okay to care about them while also protecting your own emotional well-being which is why boundaries in this scenario are so important.

Taylor Gaffney