A good place to start is by doing research on the basics of the particular disorder and seeing what you can learn directly from the individual. Ask to hear about their personal experience of it while understanding that these challenges usually involve themes of control and anxiety. Naturally, people are guarded when it comes to sharing trauma or struggles of self-worth so always make sure you respect their boundaries. You will need a foundational understanding of their situation to determine how to support them. Has it been fully established that they have an eating disorder? Have they sought professional help or medical intervention? Are they currently enrolled in any group programs or treatment plans? If they're not seeking help, gently explore what hesitations may be holding them back. Create a safe space for their concerns and fears to be understood. Offer to sit and go through resources that can demystify what treatments are out there; browse options with them for therapists specializing in eating disorders or Overeaters Anonymous (OA) groups. All the while, be sure not to pressure them into a decision they are not ready for.

If they are already undergoing care, they will likely have specific ways for you to support them in their treatment plan. Remember: they are bigger than their eating disorder! What they are struggling with is only part of their experience so don't anchor all your conversations/interactions around topics of weight, appearance, or eating habits. As mentioned earlier, intrusive thoughts and fixation are common experiences related to eating disorders so be mindful that even positive comments (eg., "you look healthy today") can trigger upsetting feelings.

Josiah Teng