You survived a suicide attempt. Now what?

HOW TO HEAL FROM AND HONOR YOUR EXPERIENCE

By Jackie Menjivar

(Corey Hearne / Unsplash)

Warning: Content discussed addresses suicide.

No matter how long it’s been since your attempt, we are so glad that you’re here. You’ve survived a life-threatening health crisis. Take a second to acknowledge just how incredible that is and just how strong you are.  

You’re also not alone. More and more people are speaking out about their experiences as survivors. The unfortunate reality is that, while you’re usually flooded with tons of support and resources right after an attempt, steps for your long-term recovery are a little less clear. 

This is a part of your history, and you may even consider it a part of your identity. What do you do in the months, years, or even decades after such an emotionally intense experience? How do you heal from the past while honoring what you’ve been through? These steps are a place to start. 

Have a plan to stay safe.

Chances are you already have one of these, but it’s never a bad idea to revisit it every so often. A safety plan is a resource you put together to help you get through a suicidal crisis. When you’re in pain, it can be hard to remember the strategies and resources that you have to help you cope. Listing them all out in one place makes it easier (and there are even apps that can help you make one). Consider including:

• Triggers and warning signs. What are the things that lead up to intense emotions or suicidal thoughts?

• Personal distraction strategies. What can you do by yourself to take your mind off of things?

• Outside distraction strategies. Who can you be around, or where can you go when you need some positive interaction?

• People who can support you. Who do you feel comfortable reaching out to when you’re in crisis? 

• Crisis resources. What doctors, counselors, organizations, hotlines, or other professionals can you contact? 

• Dangerous items. What things do you need to remove from your surroundings to stay safe?

• Positive reminders. What are your personal reasons for living? What gives you hope? What’s your anchor?

Acknowledge your feelings.

Your feelings may not be as raw as they were right after an attempt, but don’t downplay the long-term emotional impact of what you’ve been through. Sometimes you expect to feel the weight of it. Feelings are bound to come up when you’re talking about it or getting close to an anniversary. But other times, it can hit you out of nowhere. You may not even realize all the feelings you’ve been carrying with you for so long.

A lot can come up — shame, guilt, sadness, anger, regret. Learn how to process your emotions in a healthy way, or consider working through them with a professional. Looking inwards and acknowledging that they’re there is the first step.

Reflect on your progress.

Depending on how long it’s been, your life may look and feel completely different now (and if it doesn’t, that’s okay too!). At the bare minimum, just surviving and living to see however many new days is something to be proud of. 

Take some time to reflect on how far you’ve come. Even if you still have hard days, recognize how resilient you are. Take stock of the things you’ve accomplished, the people you’ve connected with, and the things that have brought you hope since your attempt. 

Recognize the anniversary of your attempt. 

Your feelings toward this day (or days) are personal to you. You might feel sad, or empowered, or completely indifferent. You may even feel a mix of things. There’s no right or wrong way to approach the anniversary of an attempt. 

But what do you do on an anniversary? On a day that can feel like both a milestone and a memorial, it’s important to make space for both. You can get introspective and journal about your experience or feelings. You can surround yourself with people you love and celebrate your life. Above all, take care of yourself, and give yourself credit for making it one more year. 

Share your story.

Talking about your experience can be a major step in your recovery journey. Not only can it help you heal, it can help people going through something similar. These are a few things to consider before you share your story:

• Are you ready to speak about it? Do you feel healed enough to talk about your journey?

• What are the benefits and risks of sharing your story?

• How do you think your family, friends, and community will react? Are you prepared for that reaction?  

• What do you feel comfortable sharing? 

You can write about your experience on social media, speak publicly at an event, submit to an organization like the AFSP, SAVE, the IDONTMIND journal, or just have a conversation with a loved one. Whether you’re sharing with one person or the whole world, know that it’s incredibly brave to find your voice and shed light on these issues. Read some examples here.

Advocate.

Once you feel comfortable enough in your recovery, it may be time to help other people with their own. Get involved in suicide prevention, and let your lived experience fuel your advocacy. There are tons of ways you can be an agent of change:

• Fundraise. Raise money for organizations working to prevent suicide, either online or with an in-person event.

• Volunteer. Volunteer to support people in crisis with the Suicide Prevention Lifeline, Crisis Text Line, and The Trevor Project.

• Peer support. Become a peer supporter to guide and support people experiencing suicidal thoughts.  

• Change public policy. Tell your elected officials to make suicide prevention a national priority.  

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There’s a growing movement of people who have survived a suicide attempt that are connecting with one another, fighting stigma, and letting the world know that there’s nothing shameful about overcoming a suicidal crisis. Wherever you are in your journey, honor your experiences and recognize your strength. 

For more information, resources, and survivor stories, visit the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline’s With Help Comes Hope website.