5 Signs Racism Is Showing Up In Your Therapy Sessions

YOUR THERAPIST MAY NOT BE GIVING YOU THE CULTURALLY RESPONSIVE CARE YOU DESERVE — HERE’S WHAT TO LOOK OUT FOR

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A version of this article was originally published by Mental Health America.

Anyone can say something racist, even if they’re a good therapist in other ways. Here are some ways racism can show up in a therapy session. These are all examples of microaggressions: day-to-day examples of racism and bias, which may not seem extreme or obvious but still have an impact on mental health. They make it harder for you to trust your therapist and talk to them about your feelings and experiences. 

1

They’re dismissive. They make you feel like you’re not supposed to feel the way you do. Telling you your feelings or experiences aren’t real or valid can be a form of verbal abuse called gaslighting. 

2

They label your behaviors without considering cultural norms and expectations. For example,  a therapist might label your family relationships as being “enmeshed” or “codependent,” even if those relationships are normal in your culture. Or, they may label you as being “too angry” when your anger is justified. 

3

They avoid discussing race, even when you bring it up. Race, ethnicity, and culture affect the ways we experience the world, and that affects our mental health — a good therapist will acknowledge this and help you work through those feelings. 

4

They deny that race is important, or say that they “don’t see color.” This is called color blindness. 

5

They deflect from conversations about race and privilege by bringing up something irrelevant. This is called whataboutism. 

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In the end, remember that therapy is for you. You don’t owe your therapist anything. Your therapist is there to help you. They are being paid to help you. If you decide to cut ties and try someone else, do it sooner than later. If you continue to have bad experiences with therapy, it could make it harder to reach out for help altogether. Don’t get discouraged — there are more culturally responsive therapists out there.